Miss me much??? I do too...

As usual I have neglected this blog so much that even I thought it was no longer functioning. Then I realised it was I that was no longer functioning or for that matter writing. Anyway, here I am and I'm coming back with a not so happy post. I'm not even sure why I'm sharing this but non-the-less I am, so read on if you care to but remember it's not a very happy post.

As many of you know or maybe you don't either way I'll remind you that I have been and still am HIV positive and have been since 1986. Now the fact that I have lived with this dread disease for 25 years and am still around to be writing about it is wonderful. Well, wonderful that I'm alive not wonderful that I've had to live with this disease for so long and will continue to do so for the rest of my life. I am one of those unlucky ones that watched one to many of my friends loose their lives to this disease including two of my own partners. It will actually be exactly 25 years to the date on the 16 of this month that I found out I was positive. It's funny how you remember certain life changing things. Well maybe not so much funny as just plain odd/interesting/strange, you get my point.

I am lucky in that I was able to survive long enough to have access to the antiviral medications that became available in 1994. Those drugs and have extended and saved many peoples lives since then. I'll be honest it's not been nor is it for anyone a joy ride taking these medications with all of their various side effects like constant diarrhoea, nausea etc. Regardless, I persevered and finally found a combination that provided me with the protection I needed and had the least amount of side effects. Now, I have taken this combination of medications for over 9 years and through all of that time they have kept my little friend (aka the virus) at bay, tucked away in it's own little corner not bothering anyone.

The drugs, if you don't already know, are supposed to keep the virus at such a low level that it has a hard time replicate and as such has a hard time destroying your immune system. At the same time by holding the virus at bay and with your immune system not under constant attack the system itself is better able at repairing itself and bringing your defences up to normal or higher levels of protection. My counts as far as the virus is concerned are always in the undetectable range which is where we want it to be and my immune system albeit on the low end of normal nevertheless is in the normal range. That is until 4 weeks ago...

It seems that after all of these years of gliding along rather smoothly. My little friend has decided that it is not content with playing all by itself in that dark little corner. No, it wants to come back out and play in the sunshine with all the other immune cells, blood cells and all the other parts of my body. It just wants to have fun again. Problem is, when it has fun I don't. So, what am I saying? Well, what I'm saying is I now have a detectable viral load and my immune system is headed to the no go zone. Now, we don't need to panic because there are lots of new medications to choose from so there should be some combination I can take that will send my little friend back into his little hole where he will hopefully stay for a very long time. We have done some blood work to see what medications I have apparently be come resistant to and can no longer use and then allow us to to decide what other new medications I can try and we will go on from there.

I know I shouldn't worry but I'm not very happy at the moment. It's not that I was fooled to believe that the virus had left the building. I've not only lived with it for to long but I've also worked in the field of HIV education so I know the in and outs of this terrible disease. It's just a kick to the head and it makes you suddenly feel so damn vulnerable. All from something we can't see with the naked eye but that we got from being naked. Hmmm, I digress Anyhoo, no time to wallow in self pity, nor would I as I did enough of that a long time ago. Lets figure out what we're going to do and just do it. I've got nothing to loose and so much to gain.

17 on 14...

Well I may have missed 12 of 12 this month but I hope I've made up with this batch of photos. I took 216 photos and I brought it down to these 17 choices. I hope you enjoy them and I will try to be much more diligent when it comes to remembering next month's 12 of 12. Until then enjoy...

The one of many water themed pictures from today. This is a quaint little fountain that sits inside a small reflection garden in the middle of the city

This is part of a glass door that acts as a barrier to the inner doors of the local war memorial. Not that I'm big on war but her in Australia it seems that every major city has a rather large war memorial. Regardless if you are for war or not they are still architecturally beautiful. Can you spot the important subtlety in the glass work?

One of the many figures carved out of sandstone that adorns the memorial

Just a bit of lovely sweet and delicate wisteria.

I just liked the way the sunlight lit up the leaves of this plant.

As I said there is a bit of a water theme in these pictures. This fountain is one of two that are part of an esplanade that sits in front of Saint Mary's cathedral in the city.

The second fountain part of a reflecting pool which also occasionally has water spouts, that is also part of that esplanade in front of the cathedral.

The other side of the reflecting pool without the water spouts

This is a guess what it is photo... I will tell you that it was taken near the cathedral.

Iron work on one of the side doors of the cathedral.

There is a lot of stone carvings in the city all cut out of sandstone in most cases and this one caught my eye.

The very top of the church spires, why did I take the picture I don't know I just did...

Some more of that sandstone craftsmanship.

I can't have a set of photos without a self portrait so here it be.

This little item are part of a wall display and they are actually made out of metal

These flowers are blooming all over the city including around a hundred of them in our yard alone but don't ask me what they are.

Last but not least a bit of iron work on one of the fences and that is all for this lot of pictures. Hope you liked a few of them. I'll be back next month to bring you 12 of 12 for October. See you then...

12 of 12 for August 2010

Hello there all of you 12 of 12 fans. Yes, it's that time of the month again and I once again will try to entertain you with my photographic expertise or at least give you something to laugh about. As usual I have to give major credit for the 12 of 12 project. If it was not for the ingenuity of this man we would not have so many people each month taking part in this international photographic exhibition/experience. Anyway enough with the chatter I took these pictures around where we currently reside. So with no further adieu I give you the 12 of 12 for August 2010. Enjoy... (I hope)

Good morning with a self portrait

Hubby always brings me a Chai Latte in the mornings right after he has completed a 10 hour shift in the ER saving lives and stuff like that. He is so sweet.

Just a pretty flower to start my walk

Anyone want to go fishing?

Can you guess what this one is or what the symbol stands for?

How about putting your thinking caps one for this one too.

Just a pretty shot of the ocean and the ongoing fight between it and the land

Just a sign cut out of sandstone celebrating the beaches surf lifesavers.

A palm tree growing along with its fruit or should I say dates

The beautiful layers of the rack/sandstone. Amazing what nature and how it creates beautiful pictures without even trying

Shadow, shadow on the wall

Beehive Bovine and French Moodle are off to do a bit of shopping again...

Well that's it for ths month. I my post some thing here again before next months 12 of 12 but I'm not promising any thing I will definitely see you next time around. Take care one and all...

Also...

Wow, two in one day. I also wanted to share this little tidbit for those who don't follow my comings and goings on Facebook. I posted this little gem earlier. Read on...

I HATE Internet Service Providers!!! I HATE the whole down/upload limits crap. I HATE "If you exceed your monthly down/upload limit, we will have to drop your speed down to EFFING Prehistoric EFFING squirrel on a rotating wheel powered connection speeds." My PC is trying it's best to compensate for CRAPPY ISP but there's only so much it can do, which really is nothing.

In reality the ISP has you by the short and curlys. You can't win when you have the best plan the ISP has to offer. You can't change to a bigger and better plan as there is nothing bigger and better. But, if you sign up to get your home phone your broadband service and a new 2 year contract you can get three times the amount of up/down load limit. What the EFF is that about? I don't think so!

We pay through the nose for crap service and the best they can reply is "We have such a high demand for our service and we only have so many severs to accommodate the demand. Well buy some more EFFING servers! You surely can afford with what you charge us/ME!

Whew, I feel better. I know nothing will change but I still feel a lot better. Okay, not a lot better but better. Oh hell, who am I kidding I could rant like this for weeks and not get any where At the end of the day I went over my limit and now I'm stuck with squirrel power until the 4th of August. Nothing can do about it. Somebody just shoot me!!!

(PS I don't know why this post looks so different from the rest, in reference to font size and possible colour on some of your PC's but at least I posted it. Enjoy...) I'm trying to fix it but it will be what it will be

For Non-Facebook followers...

I just wanted to update those people who only follow this blog and not Facebook in reference to an earlier post. You know that I recently took a new job. You also know that the job is the job from hell. Well, I really need to change part of that last sentence to, the job was the job from hell. I left the job shortly after the rant I posted earlier. I actually became so distressed that at one point I was more depressed at the job than I was the whole time I was looking for a job, and believe me I was really depressed before I got that job. I mean I literally almost burst into tears the afternoon before I quit. I came back from lunch sat down at my desk, if you could call it a desk and just sat there trying not to cry and wondering what the hell was I doing. Why was I there? I barely did any work the rest of the afternoon and I could have cared less.

I came home that night and called hubby, as he was in Fiji for a friends wedding, which in hindsight I wish I had gone. It would have saved me the heartache of taking that job. So, I called him and ended up talking to him for about two hours and finally allowed myself to cry, which of course really upset hubby because he was stuck there and I here. All he said is that he would support me in what ever decision I made but based on the conversation if I would do what he wanted then he wanted me to quit the next day. In the end I did just that.

Anyway, it's done and over and I'm very happy now. I called hubby that night and as I said he was and still is very supportive. I am so very lucky to have that person in my life that person that I so proudly call my husband. He has always been there for me and always supported and encouraged me with every decision I have ever made. I know some of you might say, that's what a partner should do. I agree but sometimes they don't and in this case I just want to acknowledge that my husband is one of those that does. So, it's onward and upward from here and I'll keep you updated as to what comes along on the job front. Until then it's almost time for 12 of 12 so I'll see you then. Take care...

12 of 12 for July 2010

12 of 12 time is here and as always I am very excited but there is a big ol' spoon of trepidation I must take that tempers my excitement. What I mean is I'm always worried there won't find the right things to photograph. Of course I was extra worried this month that my pictures were going to struggle because I was going to have to use the camera on my IPhone as 12 of 12 fell on Monday, a work day. Well that was sorted easy enough, seeing that I quit my new job last Friday. It's long story and I won't take away from 12 of 12 boring you with the details suffice it to say I got to use my good camera and what follows is what you get for this month, I hope you enjoy and as always I have to thank this MAN, for if not for him I would not be showing these photos. I thank him for creating this project which gives me the impetus to take at least 12 pictures once a month and as such keeps my dreams of taking good pictures one day alive. All I can do now and in the future is to keep taking pictures and what I get is what you'll see. The rest will just have to fall into place. At least that's what I'm hoping happens. So, here's this months 12 of 12 and they were mainly taken around the area of Manly near were we now live. I tried very hard to make this months pictures interesting. We'll have to see what you think so here we go...

Looking down part of the Manly boardwalk

Just one of the interesting fun fact boards they have around the boardwalk/beach at Manly.

A view over to downtown Sydney from North Head

Just some symmetrical trees at a park called Little Manly

Just a very bright fisherman. Wonder if he thinks the red will attract the fish?

An interesting pattern and your guess what it is picture of the month..

Now, I know that it is an ongoing battle to get people to clean up after there dogs but I've never seen a sign where they had to literally show people what they needed to do. Look how real it is, I mean really look

I just love really seeing the intricate nature of flowers. Actually these flowers are quite small and if I hadn't gotten close I would have never see the beauty of this little flower.

You know, back in the 20' and 30's and many years before that we as people used to put a lot of craftsmanship into our work. Now a day a piece of glass and a piece of steel and you've got a house/building. Not back then, back then things were given details and beauty in there own right. These are sitting on top each of the columns at an old bathing pavilion near Manly beach...

This months self portrait time 2 courtesy of the glass windows...

Out to the harbour through the arches, trying to be artistic???

...and last but not least a sign placed on the footpaths all around the pavilion as there is a penguin colony around this part of the beach. They re usually only here from dusk until dawn but none the less they are around and you never know when one of the little buggers may have overslept and it and has to suddenly run across the footpath to get to the water. It could happen... Anyway, that's all I've got for this month so I hope you enjoyed. See you next month...

12 of 12 for June 2010

Well it's been a really long time between posts but I'm still kicking. For those of you who still keep tabs on me, I thank you for sticking with me not only when I'm posting the most boring post ever but also when I get to regal you with my amateur photography. I think I said a few months ago that this is probably going to end up being a photo blog. I just don't seem to have the time to sit down and type something and then at the same time make it interesting. At least with my pictures I can amuse you with a little colour.

Anyway, here are this months 12 of 12 photos. I took all of these shots within five minutes walking distance from my house. I live in a very beautiful part of the world and I know that I am so very lucky to be able to enjoy what the world has to offer right outside my doorstep. I must mention that 12 of 12 would not be possible if not for this man. Check out his blog and you can also check out some of the other blogger's photos that participate in 12 of 12. Enjoy....

Right outside our front door. They are usually more colourful but since we are officially into our winter months a lot of things don't flower as much, but the pots are nice.

The other side of our front door...

Even though there are no blooms right out side our front door. I can always find things like this hibiscus blooming in our garden pretty much year round. We also have orange, yellow and deep red ones

Mr Frog sits at the entrance of one of the small rest and relaxation garden. We basically have three garden spaces two up front and then the backyard pool area. This one is made up of ferns and lots of shade but also very airy. It' a nice place to sit on a hot afternoon.

Just an interesting plant that suddenly bloomed theses little cluster of greenish flowers. I just think it looks nice against the fence, but to each his own...

A nice place to sit and relax with an angel to keep you company

Just one of many thousand palm trees around but this one is really old and as you can see vey big.

In December 1914, Duke Kahanamoku, the world sprint swimming champion, was touring Australia. He selected timber from a Sydney firm to fashion a board modelled on those used in his native Hawaii, and during a demonstration to the press, introduced surf board riding to Australia at Freshwater Beach (This is where I live) on Thursday 24 December. It was the first recorded time that anyone had surfed the clean waves beyond the break in Australian waters using this Hawaiian-style surfing technique.

It was so popular that a second spur of the moment demonstration was given on a Sunday in January 1915. Duke topped the performance by taking a local young girl, Isabel Letham on the board with him to surf the waves. Isabel went on to become a pioneer of Australian surfing. The board has been kept in a display in the Freshwater Surf Club since 1952. There is now a statue of Kahanamoku on the headland at Freshwater.

The big building used to be an old monastery and then it was an all boys catholic school and now it is a culinary school.

A bottle brush

There's always someone trying to get in a little surfing

...and there is always or almost always someone fishing off the rocks around the beach. Every year they have at least one person who gets caught up in a sudden swell and the get knocked off the feet and they get swept ot into the water. Here's hoping this guy can swim...